This week’s event is the Jubilee Celebrity Golf Tournament, hosted by the Jubilee Family Development Center.
The event took place at the Boonsboro Country Club, home to décor as kitschy as it comes.
I’m going to take a look at each of the “celebrity” golfers, and their outfits, in turn. The "celebrity" list featured:
- Rashad Jennings
- Tuck Tucker
- Randall Wallace
- Kathy Byron
- Scott Garrett
- Danny Rocco
First we have Rashad Jennings, the LCA student turned NFL running back. Sadly, he cannot run from his own lack of fashion. He sported beige and maroon plaid shorts, matched with a kelly green polo shirt. I might normally let this combination slide (it is a golf course after all), but the outfit was paired with a pair of bright orange, knee-high socks. What would possess him to wear those travesties is beyond me.
Next, we have Tuck Tucker, Lynchburg’s little cartoonist that could. I have to give Tuck a lot of latitude. He’s a cartoonist, so I don’t really expect him to be sporting Dolce or Couture. His outfit of jeans, a SpongeBob tee, and white shoes did the trick. That’s about all I can say. There’s not much to criticize or applaud when it comes to jeans and a tee.
I must say, I admire Randall Wallace’s guts. Wallace, a screenwriter, best known for Braveheart, strolled onto the golf course wearing a real life, no fooling, honest to goodness kilt.He managed to wear that kilt as well as you can wear a kilt. He constantly looked like he was being devoured by bagpipes, which is about as well as you can wear a kilt. Why he chose it, I’ll never know. And to be honest, I probably don’t want to.
Next, we have the delegates. People have lumped them together throughout the whole event, so I will too. Kathy Byron was wearing a pair of khaki shorts, and a mauve polo shirt. The top was entirely too tight and too bland, and the shorts were too short. She might remember to dress her age. Scott Garrett wore a classic, subdued outfit. It was a pair of khaki pants, paired with a black polo shirt. There is beauty in simplicity. I would give him the best dressed award, but for some unimaginable reason, he wore a bow tie with the polo. Was it a desperate attempt to stand out, to outshine the football powerhouses of attention? We’ll never know.
And last, but not least, we have LU’s football coach, Danny Rocco. Danny sported a loose pair of khakis and a Liberty Flames polo. The Flames polo tells me he didn’t spend a whole lot of time picking out his outfit. I imagine he walked into his closet the morning of the event, grabbed one of the dozens of Liberty polos and headed out the door. You don’t even win any effort points, coach.
Overall, I was bored by the fashions at the Jubilee Celebrity Golf Tournament. For sporting so many “celebrities,” I hoped to see something new and fresh in the fashions, but that was nowhere to be seen. I do have to thank Randall Wallace. Without his kilt, the day would have been beyond tedious. So, Wallace, keep wearing that kilt. Shock value will always have a special place in my heart.
Until next time,
Marcus Larue
